Married young

Friday, February 12, 2016

In December, Alex and I celebrated our 5 year anniversary! A truly magical day that I still get butterflies thinking about, but I don't completely recommend getting married on December 17th. It's not exactly the ideal time for celebrating with Christmas right around the corner, and it usually ends up being an afterthought. This year was no exception. We were on our long haul to the U.S., waiting in the Orlando airport for our next flight when I realized it. 

"OH my gosh! Happy anniversary!! 
...What should we do?!" 

In that moment we were trying to get Liam asleep by taking laps around the airport in his stroller. Alex looked at me and said, "Um. Hold hands?" I laughed pretty hard at that. 

5 years??! In some ways, it seems unbelievable how fast the time has flown. But yet, so much growth and change has happened since that day.

Being exclusively dating was slow, but once we hit that point it ironically went insanely fast. The decision to get married was quick. "Once you know, you know" they always say. I always rolled my eyes at that. Know WHAT? There are so many parts, layers, and quirks to a person- how can you ever take that leap of faith without knowing them for at least a few years? 

No, we didin't live together before we got married. We didn't even know each other for a whole year before we got married. And I was 20 YEARS OLD. How can you trust a 20 year old with arguably the most important decision of their life?? And what about all that I was going to miss out on? Believe me- I totally get how nuts it sounds! 

I always grew up believing that the decision of who and when to marry would be the most difficult, mind boggling one of all. I imagined months of weighing out the pro's and cons, going back and forth, breaking up and getting back together again.. the whole shebang.

However, when that decision came I was able to narrow down all those factors into 3 key points:
1. Is he my best friend?
2. Does he truly love God (as shown by his actions)?
3. Would I want my sons to be just like him?

Guess what, it was the easiest, biggest decision of my life. In a lot of ways I was inexperienced, didn't know what I wanted, naive... However I was also moldable, and best of all I got to learn and grow with Alex by my side. We studied for finals and edited each other's papers, graduated together, traveled, learned Portuguese and adjusted to life in Brazil together, heck- we even had a baby! The most trying, but absolutely the most joyous challenge of them all. We have learned and grown, and of course are still learning like crazy. Essentially, we are growing up and growing old together.  

Side note: But actually, attending BYU, getting married young isn't that outlandish. In fact, in that tiny bubble of the world over 1/4th of the student body is married, which probably makes it the most unique college atmosphere in the country. That may sound nuts, but honestly it is a little refreshing when it seems like the whole world is terrified of marriage.

I really wish marrying young wasn’t seen as such an irresponsible, and even weird thing. Clearly, it isn't the route for everyone. But it was mine, and I can honestly say that I wouldn't change a thing.

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